“The Art of a Good Marriage”

by Wilferd Arlan Peterson

"A good marriage must be created.
In marriage the "little" things are the big things.
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say, ”I love you" at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is having a mutual sense of values, and common objectives.
It is standing together and facing the world.
It is forming a circle that gathers in the whole family.
It is speaking words of appreciation, and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is not only marrying the right person -- it is being the right partner."

"I Love him, that will take us through"

“I have discovered that choosing whom to marry based on romantic feelings alone, is often misleading. Romance tells us nothing about character and is extremely unreliable as a method of determining the viability or vitality of a relationship”-B.Odukoya

       If you use the butterflies that you feel, as the basis for marriage than I must say that you are making a grave mistake.  I am not underestimating the need for romantic feelings to be present in a relationship but marriage needs far more than just the feelings to survive the obstacles that life brings your way. In today’s world with the outrageous divorce rate, the majority of the couples who end up in a messy divorce would testify that they once “loved each other”.

So, is marriage about ‘love’? Not entirely.  What those who opt for a divorce seem to misunderstand is that marriage was not promised to be a smooth ride nor a bed of roses like Hollywood portrays, on the contrary. 


Let’s turn to the Holy Bible for a minute. Locate 1 Corinthians 7 verse ²⁸ which states that “those who marry will face many troubles in this life” (NIV) .
The Bible does not promise you a perfect fairytale like the majority of young women envision, but plenty troubles. As youths, there seems to be this notion that “once I get married all my troubles are gone” but this is just a myth. 


     Brace yourself and depend on God, and God alone. Invite Christ Jesus into your relationship, at least with him you are sure that when the storms are raging(which they will);he won’t be too far to help. 

“A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.” 
                                                                              Ecclesiastes 4:12(NLT)

To Know Now is Better than to Regret Later...

The Video above is taken from one of Myles Munroe's Sermons. It explains some of the basic fundamentals that ought to be known about the opposite sex. Many times we neglect to take into account the differences that exist between the sexes and dive straight into matrimony. Stay tuned for more of these intriguing revelations on this blog.

"Dr. Munroe is an internationally-renowned author, lecturer, teacher, life coach and government consultant and leadership mentor"

Advice to the wise...

So, I was going through my day routinely when I suddenly decided to check the inbox, dear praying unmarried woman, and was pleasantly surprised to see this letter written for you. I know without a doubt that you will be blessed by these advices as it was thoughtfully written for your benefit.

"Marriage is a relationship in which two people have pledged themselves to each other in the manner of a husband and wife, NOT A WOMAN TO A WOMAN OR A MAN TO A MAN.

Many people happily enter into marriage with the hope that it will last a lifetime. Unfortunately, some couples are so preoccupied with the immediate benefits of marriage that they fail to thoroughly weigh the realisms involved in a lifetime commitment. 

Based on my premarital experience, I suggest the following on how to prepare for a successful and God glorifying marriage.

Seek God`s Approval: Ask God for insight and listen for God`s answer, be obedient to God`s instruction because lifetime decisions without God`s direction can lead to disastrous results.

Assess the relationship: Consider your motives in marrying: Are they right ones have you developed a real friendship, and do you communicate with one another or is most of your time spent getting physical.

Discuss major Issues: Personal expectations, finances, and in-laws are three universal issues that can cause serious problems if not addressed beforehand. Observe the actions and reactions of your spouse to be when these issues are discussed. This will give you some idea of what to expect after the wedding.

Seek premarital counseling early: Part of the traditional wedding service states that ``holy matrimony, which is an honorable estate, instituted of God is not to be entered into lightly or unadvisedly.”  You and your fiancé or fiancée should get a godly counseling, both jointly and individually.

If in doubt, Don`t- If you are having second thoughts, postpone the wedding, talk openly and honestly about your feelings with your spiritual adviser or counselor. Taking time to be sure is far better than spending a lifetime being sorry, miserable, and angry with your spouse or yourself, do not allow yourself to be pressured into marriage by people or circumstances.

Know what God requires of you: God expects you to honor your vows and will hold you accountable to them. Realize that the commitment is for as long as you both shall live, not until the better gets worse, the health becomes sickness, or the money gets scarce. God`s plans is for lifetime commitment.

There are no fifty-fifty percentages in marriage: Both persons must determine to give one hundred percent regardless of the return. Making a lifetime commitment means that you cannot just conveniently change your mind if communication goes bad, your needs go unmet, your mate gains weight, or your feelings change- not if you want to maintain a right relationship with God.  At those times when the glow of romance dims, trust God to provide you with sufficient grace, wisdom and guidance to see you through.

Take time to prepare honestly and prayerfully for a lifetime commitment. It can mean the difference between glorious and successful and failure in marriage.

God bless you."